A Parting And A Coming Together

"My family is my strength and my weakness".

-Aishwarya Rai Bachchan

  Family. Sometimes it is difficult for me to explain my family. We have been through so much together, (and apart), over the years. My family is not perfect, as some of yours may be. Over the years we have shared great times; as well as devastating moments such as the early loss of our mother, the economic and emotional hardships we endured afterwards, and the subsequent separations we experienced as we grew into adulthood.  I believe that each one of us has sat alone with our thoughts and wondered how we would have fared in life had our mother survived her illness. Would we all have gone to college? Would some of us have married at a young age or would we have even married that particular mate? Would we have become so independent at an early age or would we follow the paths of so many youth of today and stay under our parents roof well into adulthood?

  I stopped mulling over these type questions many years ago. I have long accepted my lot in life and have concluded that it is the will of God that I have taken the paths, (whether good or bad), that I was destined to take.  

  Recently I was blessed with the opportunity to see my twin brothers again after many months of non-communication. Without going into detail, I will simply say that the enemy had been successful in causing a breach in our relationship and until we were face-to-face we did not realize how we had been deceived. Sadly, it took the passing of our childhood friend, Winston's, mother, (Judith Nixon), to bring us together again. In many ways Mrs. Nixon had been like a mother to us as we were growing up and there was no way that we would not be able to attend her home going.  I view our recent reunion as mother Nixon's final charitable act towards us, and for this I am so very grateful. 

  As Winston and me and my brothers congregated and began to reminiscence I began to feel the resurgence of the special love that has been between us for years. Someone once said "funerals are not for the dead but for the living". I saw this to be so true as we talked and took pictures and laughed together.  My relationship with my brothers has always been a special one. I am thankful to God for allowing us to come together again in this life and disperse any evil intent to keep us apart.  

  There is still much work to be done concerning me and several other members of my family, but I will be faithful to believe that even those situations are already being worked on by God.  

  Sometimes it's so hard to walk through the storm but it is possible.

  I love you all.

  Dennis   

Don't Be So Cheap

"Do not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain; The worker is worthy of his wages".

1 Timothy 5:18

  I took my car to the car wash the other day. It was the type in which you had the option of getting a simple run through or "the works". I, of course, elected to get the full treatment for my car. I watched patiently as the attendants vacuumed my car prior to sending it through the automated wash. Later, as it came through the final dryer stage, I watched another attendant enter my car and drive it over to the final prep area and then run back to retrieve another car coming out of the wash tunnel. 

  It was at this time that I reached into my wallet and took out $2.00 in order to tip the attendant who would complete the final stages of the wash.  To be honest, I hesitated at the thought of even giving a tip because the full-service already had cost me $23.00.  I clenched my fist around the two dollars I held in my hand and convinced myself that this amount was "just fine".

  Minutes later a young man arrived at my car and began to get it ready for me to receive it. I stood by and watched with a deep satisfaction as he tended to my car as if it was his own. He was exceptionally meticulous as he cleaned the windows inside and out, wiped down the leather seats, polished the mirrors, and applied the coating material to my tires to make them shine.  As he continued to detail my car I decided to go back inside to the attendant who manned the cash register and I asked him to make change for a $20.00. I realized that the young man deserved more than a $2.00 tip and I gifted him with $10.00 as I left.

  Often we fail to follow the teaching that states "It is better to give than receive", (Acts 20:35). Having the ability to go shopping for clothes, to buy groceries on a regular basis or even to purchase items that we "want" and not necessarily need is a blessing within itself; but I have learned that I feel more joy in my heart whenever I "bless" another; especially when they are not expecting it. 

  I also believe that many do not give graciously, (such as generous tips to waiters in restaurants or money and other gifts to those who are obviously in need), is because these acts of kindness are not often reciprocated and one can easily sulk within himself and let that "human nature" take over that says "Well, what about them doing for me sometime?" Denying one's self is not always easy but it is necessary if we sincerely desire to show the light of God within us. 

  But this is what being a blessing is truly about, isn't it. I am blessed in the fact that I am able to live far better than I did as a child and that my family is well cared for. I love sending the random package to a friend or a family member who is not expecting anything at all.  Giving goes beyond merely paying tithes in church. Giving means nothing if we only give to those who are able to pay us back.

  How many people loose their blessings because they are only interested in what they can get out of this life for themselves? Can you remember when you were the type of friend who would say "If I've got ten dollars you have five of that? When we give out of faith and a pure heart we will find that our bucket will never run out of oil, (read 2 Kings chapter 4 regarding the prophet Elisha and the widow woman's oil). 

  Let's be salt, my friends. The world needs it badly.

  I love you all.

  Dennis

   

    

  

Saying Goodbye To Mother Nixon

"Into each life some rain must fall."

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

 

 

  I received word this morning that mother Judith Nixon passed away last night. I am deeply hurt, but am also somewhat relieved that her pain is no more. 

 
  Mother Nixon had been in my life for as far back as I can remember. Me and my twin brothers were friends with her son, Winston, as children. Winston was one of those kids who immediately became family shortly after we met him. He was there shortly after my mother had died. His father was a career soldier and Mrs. Nixon was an educator. My brothers and I used to love spending the night over his house because Mrs. Nixon would cook great meals, (which we were not accustomed to having), and wash our clothes in her washing machine. We didn't have a washing machine at our home so we were relegated to hand washing our items in the bath tub. Also, food was always an issue at our home. We never had much. As fine as Winston and his family lived he would spend numerous days, and nights, at our home because we did so many things together such as singing, dancing, or just clowning around. I must confess that I secretly wished we would spend more time at his home; primarily because of mother Nixon.

 

  Mother Nixon was so kind and soft spoken. If she ever raised her voice I never knew it. She was strong on education and was so gentle and generous. It wasn't long after that I secretly desired to be her son. 

  Mother leaves behind her loving children; Wayne Winston, Isaac, Mia, Nicole and Nikki; as well as a host of beautiful grandchildren. My comfort comes in knowing that she is now in the loving arms of her husband, Clayvon, (who preceded her ten years ago), and with our Lord in glory.

   It has been said that some people pass through our lives merely to touch our hearts in specific ways. Mother Nixon was one of those such people in my life. I emulated her love for her children. I was motivated to do my best in the field of education. She inspired me to want to provide the best home setting for my own family. I miss her so much already.

  My prayers and hopes are now set towards her children and grandchildren. There is a huge hole left in their hearts and I wish I could hug each of them at this very moment. I know that there will be many endearing memories of mother Nixon for years to come.

  Thank you, Mother Nixon, for being such an influential part of my life.
  Dennis

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



It's What You Say

 

 Death and life are in the power of the tongue,And those who love it will eat its fruit.

Proverbs 18:21

New King James Version (NKJV)

  I was meditating on some things the other evening and that's when I discovered that I am at peace more at this juncture in my life than I have ever been. I have learned so much; experienced a great deal, suffered wrongs at the hands of "friends" and even have scars caused by my own hands. I've learned to never say "never" and I have seen miracles and have had visions and dreams that can only be attributed to a higher power.  

  I recall how earlier in my life, when I was going through my first divorce, how I was always financially destitute. I seemed to always be broke due to having to fulfill my legal obligations and manage my own needs. I recall how one day I simply told God that I never wanted to be broke again.  There were times when all I had in my wallet was a single dollar bill; but I wasn't broke. That's when I began to experience the power of the very words we speak.  It didn't only stop with that but I eventually learned to "control" my environment by adhering to sage advice concerning the avoidance of bad behavior distancing myself from people who are habitually negative, toxic, untruthful and consistently immoral. Do I still make mistakes? I certainly do, but I am able to recover from them more quickly these days. Sometimes it's as simple as knowing that you can't have your cake and eat it, too.  Even habitual characteristics that one has grown up with can be deleted from our lives. As they say in Texas, "You have to rise above your raising". 

  

"If we are unfaithful, He abides faithful, for He cannot deny Himself."

2 Timothy 2:13 

 

  I do not have the luxury to lie awake at night worrying about whether I and my family will eat next month or have a roof over our heads. I do believe that God's eyes are on the sparrow and he will do just what he said he would do which is to watch out for His children and supply our every need. To those who find no belief in God; this message will not assuage your worries about tomorrow. For those who know of God's faithfulness we will gain empowerment and courage to outlast even this debacle.  Remain positive in the absence of light, my friends. See things as they should be and not as they appear to be. Have faith in spite of what your natural situation tells you.  Tell that mountain to get out of your way!

  I wish you peace, success and love.
  Dennis

Remembering Those Things Which Brought Me Through

 

 

"Get Wisdom And Understanding; Forget it Not; Neither Decline From The Words Of My Mouth". Proverbs 4:5

  I awakened this morning with more energy than I usually have in the morning. There was an urgency in my spirit that urged me to get focused, get organized, and prepare to answer the call.  I am always concerned about my family's well-being and security, but it felt as if there was something more pressing to accomplish.

 A quick shower and a bowl of Frosted Flakes had me ready to take on the day. It was then I heard the television news reporting on a clothing and food drive to help the homeless and those in shelters throughout the city. I immediately got busy going through my closets to find any and all clothing that I no longer could fit into or no longer wore. Anyone who knows of my appearance when I was working can attest that my clothes were always clean and pristine; so I am proud of the fact that I am not relegated to donating worn, torn or outdated items. I did the same regarding the food pantry. We will collect the wife and son's items tonight so that we may deliver them to the shelter tomorrow. Like others, I have donated before but sometimes we need a reminder.

  As I've mentioned in earlier blogs, I come from a family of nine; seven children and two adults. I was what was commonly referred to as the knee baby. I wasn't the oldest child nor was I in the middle, as far as age was concerned. I was not the youngest either. I was next to the last born. To me this was always a vicarious position. Even before my young mind was able to properly process my feelings I had always felt somewhat out of place among my siblings. I was too young for the older siblings to cart me around on their daily adventures. The twins, who were a year older than I, had each other.  And I found no functionality in my baby sister as a playmate so I usually made friends with other kids my age in the neighborhood.

  Today I still vividly remember the encouragements and exhortations of my mother towards me. She never ceased in urging me to love books and reading. Perhaps it was only to keep me busy so that she could have some quiet time throughout the day, but I have always felt that she did it because she recognized something in me that needed to be cultivated. Through learning to love reading I discovered many things I may not have learned by merely existing as a child on a playground. Through books I learned of problem solving and through both the non-fiction and fiction I developed an understanding of fantasy, imagination, communication, reasoning and problem solving; all of which I greatly attributed to my successful military career among other things in my life. All that I am today I attribute to the continual encouragement of my mother.

  So why write of this today, you ask? It is because  early admonishments from my mother to "love reading" has allowed me to go elsewhere when I am faced with disappoint, uncertainty, despair, confusion, anger or woe. A good book or an intriguing article allows me to escape negative feelings, negative people and even circumstances which may seem out of my hand and allow me the opportunity to view my actions and/or the actions of others in a less controlling light.

Sometimes it is the things of old which bring us through the trials of today.
Have a good day.
Dennis 

Coming From A New Place

 

We're here.
I, and my family, have finally made it to Memphis, Tennessee. Oh, it's not as if we were targeting this area for years and now it has finally come to fruition; in fact, it wasn't even a distant thought. But, as fate would have it, we were given the  unexpected opportunity to come here to live. My many years in the military had gotten me accustomed to moving every few years. These days I absolutely abhor being displaced from my creature comforts and familiar environment, but it helps when the move is government sponsored; as this one was.

So we came to Memphis where we have no semblance of family and knew not a soul, but then we have the esteemed pleasure of knowing God and He prepared the way for us and set us up in record time.

I am looking forward to many great adventures in this grand city. There is so much history here such as the legendary Beale Street, and the FedEx Forum, home of the Memphis Grizzlies. I can drive by Elvis Presley's Graceland home at any time of the day and I can visit the Stax record museum in downtown Memphis. The Nike shoe factory is here, as well. The Lorraine Motel, where civil rights icon, Dr. Martin Luther King, JR, was slain is also merely minutes away. There is so much live music entertainment throughout the city and who can boast, (humbly, I must add), that the church they attend on Sunday has none other than the Reverend Al Green as its pastor. Yes, the Let's Stay Together Al Green of old. Each Sunday at his church is a veritable melting pot of people from all over the world who have made seeing Rev. Al Green one of the "historical" sites in Memphis. By the way; he can really preach.

Although some things change some things will remain the same. My gratefulness to God for keeping me and my family, my friends on Facebook, and this planet will forever remain. I have burned some bridges but have built new and lasting ones from the ashes.

I will now go forth and prepare my day.
God bless you all.
Dennis

Shutting It Down

Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.

Albert Camus

 
An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.

Buddha

 Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

Oprah Winfrey

 I haven't blogged in a while. In fact, I haven't had the passion to write due to so many changes, both positive and negative, in my life. While I will pass on the opportunity to divulge what has occurred, (and is occurring), with me I will say that I have concluded that I need to "refresh" some of my Facebook friends.
 
 When I first activated my fb account a few years ago I believed it was an exciting way to keep up with old military friends, former childhood friends, family, new acquaintances and the like. I have a proclivity to encourage people, love people, support the dreams of others and to sometimes share experiences from my past and/or present.  But there are several hateful people out there in Facebook land. You peer on the pages of others solely to criticize their lives or to speak ill of their blessings. I have never been one to attempt to collect an abundance of people to call "friend" because I believe this word has lost its meaning in our modern world.  I used to wonder why some of my fb friends would take a break or simply shut-down their sites. I no longer wonder .

 If I do decide to emerge with a new page in the future I ask that those who are offended by my blogs, my positive attitude, my tendency to love people of all races, my straightforwardness, my belief in confronting untruths; please do not bother to solicit my friendship. I truly love so many of you but some of you have bewildered me with your ways.

 I wish you love,
 Dennis