Knowing Who You Are

  When is the last time anyone genuinely inquired as to how you are doing? I'm not talking about the standard "How are you doing?" greeting, but someone sincerely wanting to know how you are' both inside and out. I spend a great amount of time listening to others. I can probably tell you more about some people than you would care to know and it isn't because I'm a gossip. I just make it a practice to listen well. The trouble with being a good listener is that there aren't may people who actually practice listening to others so you may find yourself having listened to someone for hours only to have the conversation end on a one-sided note; You know intricately more about them but they haven't asked you one question about yourself.

  I do believe that there was a time when communicating was full duplex, (conversation going back and forth between two parties simultaneously), instead of half duplex (communication being accomplished between parties but not simultaneously). Growing up in the 60's I learned so much from my mother who was a very communicable person. True enough, she taught me to love the written word and encouraged me to read anything from encyclopedias to dictionaries to folk tales but she encouraged me to express myself, as well.  My memories of my mother are very vivid and plethoric and for some reason it seemed as if I spent more time with her then I did with my siblings. After she passed away her absence in my life was never replaced by another.

  Romans 12:3 states "...do not think that you are better than you really are. Use good sense and measure yourself by the amount of faith that God has given you." (Contemporary English Version).  I do try to be humble but at the same time I am bold enough to recognize that I am an exceptionally smart and talented man. I know that much of my drive to "be better" came from being the sixth out of seven children. Like David in the Bible, I felt that I was overlooked many times because of my small stature and plain appearance. Whenever my parent's would have social gatherings at our home, (which was quite often),  most of the attention was centered around the twins, (who were a year older than me), my older siblings who could sing and dance, and my baby sister. It wasn't until The Jackson 5 arrived on the music scene that I even conceived being the focal point of anything.  To this very day I am thankful for Michael Jackson for encouraging me to get out front.

  Still, through my schooling, the military, the ministry, my marriages, working with special needs children and incarcerated youth I found myself, once again, having to strive extra hard to show people that I did, in fact, exist.  

  Perhaps I am destined to be as I am until my final days. If that is the case then I am not in despair because I really want God to get all of the credit for any good thing that I have said and done in life; however, I would not be telling the truth if I didn't confess that I would love for  someone to genuinely say to me "Tell me about yourself, Dennis." 

  Michael Bassey once said, "Popularity makes no sense if your fame is a shame." Knowing this, I will ascribe to the type of life described by Virginia Woolf when she wrote, "Better was it to go unknown and leave behind you an arch, then to burn like a meteor and leave no dust." 

  Life is sometimes complicated.
  
I suppose I'm feeling a bit in my feelings today.