Remembering Our Dreams

"When people conclude that all is futile, then the absurd becomes the norm"

Stanley Crouch

 

   I got tired of laying on my back today. I wasn't in bed all day, just for a portion of the afternoon. You see, I injured my back when I was in the military and sometimes it flares up on me unawares and my normally sporadic schedules gets side-lined until the pain subsides. I pray that I am not sounding as if I am whining; I hate to be a complainer, for there are far worse situations than my own ailment that deserves God's attention.  But if you believe that everything happens for a reason, as I do, then you will also do as I do; make lemons out of your lemonade.

  While paused I began to meditate on "Making It". I'm referring to that position in life whereas one will say that they have attained; and not merely on a spiritual level, but on a financial and materialistic level, as well.  I'm not your boy who aspires to be spiritually complete but lives a life of pauperdom. And this thought gave rise to another question in my active mind: Why are we given such awesome gifts only to find ourselves mainstreamed into a field that is so familiar and safe and oh, so boring.  I would venture to say that somewhere along the way our dreams became side-swapped by what is commonly known as reality.  And who determines your reality or my reality?  It ought to be us determining our own direction but sadly, that is not the case. 

  Life is filled with stories of those who pressed on towards their dreams until they struck oil.  as a child, my siblings and I were given many opportunities to sing and perform in front of our parent's guests. What applause we received and what sincere praise was given to our efforts. But reality said "Your family is too darn poor and too black and to ugly and too normal to pursue a musical dream".  And so we all found ourselves living a societal dream and working a societal job and living a socially acceptable life. I despise reality, for it is not for us but against us.  Reality says "If it feels good then it must be wrong."  Reality causes those who have a good life to believe they are undeserving of it until they forfeit it. Reality points to  all of our friends and peers who are doing what is "safe and certain" and tells us to stay away from that unusual and unpopular dream. 

  But I refuse to ride a rocking chair of what-ifs and I shoulda coulda woulda. When are they over, those dreams we have placed on hold?  I say not until we lay asleep in the earth.  But now I breathe in and slowly exhale. I focus on what it is I am going to go after and I will be relentless until it is in my hands. Tomorrow I may need to read my own words again so I will remain motivated, but that's okay. As long as I do not fall asleep.

  Dust off your dream and breathe life back into them. Sing that song, write that book, love that person, make that journey. Do it with your whole heart, and do not falter. Fear is not your friend.

  I love you all,
  Dennis