This is possibly the hardest blog I have ever written. I have some family who dislike the fact that I blog and they are sometimes bothered at how transparent and open my writings sometimes can be. It's sort of like when the celebrity, Bill Cosby, took a change from comedy and began to speak of the terrible plight of the Black Family in America. Although he was accurate in his admonishments and criticisms, many African Americans chided Mr. Cosby "for airing blacks folk's dirty laundry". I thought it was sad that people would want to censor his words of truth simply because it embarrassed them. I admit that I almost stopped blogging because of the feelings of others, but then I was reminded that I was always this way; outspoken and unashamed in every vocation I had ever undertaken. Perhaps it began with the position I maintained in my family of origin. I was the 6th born out of seven children; the knee-baby, as some would call it. I was a small child and my existence was overshadowed by three other siblings, the twins who came before me and my sister who came after me. I had no doubt my parents loved me just as equally but this fact did not preclude me from striving to be the best in everything I undertook. Whether it was singing, dancing, academics, art; I gave it my all.
Many years later while stationed in Germany I became an ordained minister. I suffered ridicule concerning my "unorthodox" ways when I was the pastor of my first Baptist church in a small town in Oklahoma. Several surrounding church pastors spoke their disdain at my not being the type of Baptist preacher they were accustomed to. They were right. I was not a Baptist preacher, nor Methodist nor Church of God in Christ for that matter. I just wanted people to be free and receive every good thing God had for them. It mattered not what color you were, how much money you made, (or didn't make), I merely wanted people to openly show genuine love for each other. My zeal for God was unmoved by the opinion of others; even some of the members in my own congregation. I recall a time when the city had a rash of young people being killed due to drug activity. We were in church one Sunday and the night before there had been another young man killed in our streets. As I stood at the pulpit before the sermon was to be preached my heart was moved in a most awesome way. I then said to the church that I was tired of the killings and how we were called to do more than cower in the safety of our buildings. With that being said, I asked those who were strong enough to be with me to follow me. I walked down from the pulpit, out of the church, and led my congregation, singing, around the corner to an area known for prostitution and drinking and drugs. We formed a circle in the street between two of the "clubs" and I preached an uncripted sermon from the center. We later left that area and returned to the church still singing and praising God, and in our midst were two women, both who were prostitutes and drug addicts, that had left that area with us and were crying and praising God for bringing them the message of salvation and saving their souls. I was later criticized by the other ministers for not getting a permit from the city to hold services outdoors. However; the local police were grateful for our efforts. I learned a long time ago that it is better to obey God than man.
As an Army sergeant I was also motivated to excel beyond the norm. I loved perfection and I sought to teach my soldiers to be the same. It was not "normal" for a senior NCO to love, defend and care for his troops as much as I did. I believed in a soldier working a grade level above what was pinned on his collar. I enjoyed watching my young soldiers stand toe-to-toe with other soldiers of higher rank and always winning. My troops were not like a family to me; they were my family. Never had I ever associated with a group of men who loved and looked out for one another with such sincerity and courage. While stationed in Germany a second time I and my soldiers were called up to war. We survived Desert Storm; physically at least. I always hoped that my soldiers fared better after the war than I did.
Tomorrow is New Year's Eve. We stand on the horizon ready to see the new year unfold. No one truly knows who will see the end of 2012. As for me, I am not afraid to live or die. I believe the Apostle Paul when he said "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain" (Philippians 1:21). Unlike some, I am thankful for the medium of Facebook. It has placed me in touch with so many friends, old and new. They have shared in my happiest moments and have been a comfort to me in my times of despair, loneliness and pain. My heart was grievously broken the other day and my Facebook friends were there for me with their prayers and sincere concern. I truly do love you all. I do not know what the future holds but I do know who holds the future. May God keep each and every one of you up to the New Year and beyond. Please be safe.
Dennis
